Archive for the ‘Psychology’ Tag

SHARING MY HOLIDAY LETTER, 2024   7 comments

I consulted with a few friends about the appropriateness of publishing my Holiday letter, and we all agreed — I’m old enough to get away with it. I don’t have to worry about my resume, and I think my reputation is sufficiently solid. I know this contains no pornography or even indecent language. So I should be good to go. Enjoy! Or not, as the spirit moves you.

MONA’S LETTER

As I write this it’s 3:55 p.m. here at The Waters of Excelsior in Minnesota and night is about to fall. Have you noticed that, at this time of year, it really does fall? In a few minutes I’ll turn on my Christmas lights ready to greet me when I get back from walking the halls for a half hour. (I have to keep my phone happy by completing its red circle. I don’t know how my phone knows what I need to do, but it says I should, so I will.) Anyway, to get to the point. I’m beginning to receive Holiday greetings from kind and timely friends, so I guess it’s time for me to roll my own news off the presses. And yes, I do have a bit of news.

Activities: I’ve been involved in the establishment of a Resident Council here. It seems that our first order of business has been to examine and encourage improvement in the way newcomers are welcomed. I think you know I’m an oldster here, in more ways than one, having moved in at the very beginning — December, 2018. By now we’re basically fully occupied with a waiting list of those who want to join us. I continue to find it a wonderful way to live, like being on a perpetual cruise without the potential for rough waters. I also enjoy the weekly meeting of our poetry/writer’s group here, expected to produce something to share every Friday. Most Thursdays I’m also in attendance at the Bible Study group currently led by Pastor (and musician) Mark Abelson from Mount Calvary Lutheran Church. Not always, though, because when son Doug is around there are many days when I’m off to various conflicting entertainments: The Guthrie Theater, Saint Paul Chamber Orchestra, Minnesota Orchestra, Cantus, The Bach Society concerts, and probably other things that are slipping past awareness right now. Oh yes, I should mention that I’m enjoying being the Correspondent for the Connecticut College for Women class of 1951. I didn’t like finding no news about us in the college magazine, as if we were gone and forgotten, so I volunteered. You do have to move pretty far into the back of the section to find us, though. I’m involved, too, in establishing a writer’s group at the Southshore community Center.

Travel: August saw son Douglas and me spending fourteen days cruising with Viking’s Octantis down the Great Lakes. It’s the same expedition ship we were on last year in the Antarctic. The difference from typical cruises is exemplified by the chemistry-classroom-like auditorium with lectures and documentaries on the broad screen up front instead of a performance theater. I don’t get to gamble, but I do satisfy my brainiac self while enjoying a cappuccino without having to pass a test at the end. While Doug takes advantage of every off-ship excursion he can fit in, I’m happy to stay on board most of the time. But I did enjoy the visit to the Ford Museum in Detroit. Wow! Those presidential limos are much longer than they seem when they appear in the news. And I enjoyed sitting in the seat that Rosa Parks had occupied on the bus when she refused to move to the back. Next year we’ll be anticipating a 2026 cruise to the Arctic on the Octantis’s sister ship, the Polaris. But, if all goes as planned, before that, in August, we’ll be cruising Viking up the Mississippi from New Orleans to Saint Paul, assuming there’ll be enough water in the river. Finally, I should mention that I did not renew my license to practice at the end of May, but, based on my academic and writing credentials, I am still available for tutoring and consulting.

Writing: Closest to my heart is working on a manuscript, intended to be a book if I can make it through the search for a publisher. Its initial title was On My Way Out, the personal story of my career in psychology with lots of tales of events along the way as the years and psychology changed. For example, My conditioned response reaction to Vaugh Monroe’s Blue Moon at the romantic high school after-prom party. But I changed the title to A Healthy Woman Was a Crazy Person when I realized how contemporary the ending was as men are now dealing with their “problem that has no name” in reaction to the success of the women’s movement. I’m available to share more info about that – eager, actually. 

SummaryTo tell the truth, I’m glad I’m on my way out. I’m so grateful for all the blessings I’ve received along the way, but I’m in no rush to close the door behind me. There’s just too much left to accomplish and enjoy. I have no doubt we’re entering a period of historically significant and probably startling change. I hope for all of us that what lies ahead will come to reflect the message of love we celebrate in this season displayed in the growth of kindness, gratitude, generosity, forgiveness, justice, and peace. In the meantime I’ll try to do my best.

Mona

Would you buy this book?   5 comments

Based on the following description, would you read this book if some agent/publisher should get interested enough to see that it turns into a real thing?

“Is there such a thing as a “kitchen table theme memoir?” If so, then this is it — chats and vignettes around the theme of my very personal experiences as psychology and I interacted with the world. Expect a no holds barred account of seventy-two years as a professor, therapist, wife, divorcee, parent, colleague, author, human being in a very complicated world. And be as surprised as I am with the way it all came together up to this point as I approach the tail end of life – a life still vigorously and demandingly keeping me awake at night.” 

I’d like to call it On My Way Out: My Life with Psi, but maybe it should be On My Way Out: From Variables to Vibes.

(This is a first stab. All suggestions are appreciated.)

I’M HAPPY FOR THE ATTENTION PAID TO MENTAL HEALTH, BUT…   2 comments

The latest thing in “explaining” mass shootings is to focus on the shooter’s mental health. All good and well. Why wouldn’t this Psychologist be happy to know people’s mental health is gaining in focus and purpose?

But this Social Psychologist doesn’t like the way it’s being used to avoid the more basic horror – the cultural grounding in which poor mental health is being fostered. What sensible, alive, and aware person doesn’t carry a substratum ache of empathy, concern, and fear in this world of cruelty, killing, and destruction. It almost seems like a mark of emotional health to be disturbed. No, I don’t like the implication that the cause lies in an individual’s deviation from the norm. On the contrary, the cause lies in the culture that fosters the human potential for evil.

Will we ever get around to looking at the painful, destructive inequities in childcare, education, financial status, health care, gender acceptance, respect, and expectations for individual accomplishment (not necessarily measured by financial wealth)? What did I leave out?

It could be done. We could create a culture based on encouraging personal growth, self-confidence, gratitude, appreciation, cognitive competence, kindness, personal value – dare I say love?  But that would require reducing the “blame the other” emphasis implied in the focus on individual mental health and looking instead at our own responsibility as part of a culture. As it is, I’m afraid we have adopted “mental health” as a way to avoid looking at our own selves.

Please notice, I haven’t used the words “mental illness.” That’s a related but different story.

MY CURRENT PERSONAL GRATITUDE LIST   15 comments

In no particular order:

  • Hot showers
  • Warm bed
  • Minimal injuries on April 15, 2015
  • Auto insurance
  • Health insurance
  • Medicare
  • Friends – those still here and those who have completed their journey. Too many to mention by name
  • Caring parents
    • Who saw to my healthcare
    • Who supported my education all the way through
    • Who set an example of happy, competent, responsible living
    • Who avoided humiliation and shame at all costs.
  • My son who’s fun to travel with, a super helper, and a source of pride
  • My daughter who’s fun to shop with, my super advisor, and a source of pride
  • My granddaughter – my favorite editor and hugger.
  • My grandson – wish I could see more of him
  • The rest of my family, both close and distant
  • Good health
  • Pension
  • Chiropractor/nutritionist who keeps me in good shape
  • Christmas – the goal of every year
  • Holland America Line
  • Travel
  • Mount Calvary Lutheran Church in Excelsior, Minnesota
  • Shepherd of the Hill Presbyterian Church in Chaska, Minnesota
  • Connecticut College
  • Boston University
  • A delightful career that wouldn’t have been possible without the two preceding items.
  • Psychology and Psychologists
  • Warm, comfortable clothes in current style
  • My patient and creative hair dresser
  • Computer
  • Cell phone
  • Soap
  • Shampoo
  • Neighbors
  • My writers group
  • My Kindle
  • Time for writing
  • Time for reading
  • Memories of High School Boyfriends
  • Memories of young love with my former husband
  • The energy I once had
  • The remaining remnants of energy
  • Faith, based on experience, that bad times will ultimately yield to better times
  • Patience to wait for decades